It has been confirmed that Samuel L Jackson (of Pulp Fiction fame) is
playing a Jedi Master in the new Star Wars prequels. The TOP 14 things
we want to hear Samuel L. Jackson's character Jedi Master Macen Windu
say in the Star Wars prequels:
14. You can stick your well-laid Death Star plans up your well-laid
ass.
13. You must go to Dagobah, where you will be taught by Yoda, the sly,
sweet motherfucker who taught me this shit.
12. That's no moon, asshole - that's a fucking space station!
11. I don't care how good you say they are. I ain't fightin' alongside
no fuck-ass teddy bears.
10. You don't need to see my goddamn identification, 'cause these
ain't the motherfuckin' droids you're looking for.
9. Womp rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I'll never know, 'cause
even if it did I wouldn't eat the filthy motherfucker.
8. This is your father's lightsaber. When you absolutely, positively,
have to kill every motherfuckin' stormtrooper in the room...
accept no substitutes.
7. If Obi-wan ain't home then I don't know what the fuck we're gonna
do. I ain't got no other connections on Tattooine.
6. Feel the Force, motherfucker.
5. "What!?" ain't no planet I've ever heard of! Do they speak Bocce
on What!?
4. You sendin' the Fett? Shit, Hutt, that's all you had to say!
3. Yeah Chewie Rocky Horror's got a hair problem. What the brother
gonna do? He's a wookie.
2. Does Jabba the Hutt look like a bitch?
1. Hand me my lightsaber... it's the one that says, "Bad Mother
Fucker."
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