Crap Jokes: Old Age: The Old Lady and the Bet


The Old Lady and the Bet

A little old lady went into the Bank of Canada one day, carrying a bag
of money. She insisted that she must speak with the president of the
bank to open a savings account because "It's a lot of money!" After
much umming and aahing, the bank staff finally ushered her into the
president's office.

The bank president then asked her how much she would like to deposit.
She replied, "$165,000!" and dumped the cash out of her bag onto his
desk.

The president was of course curious as to how she came by all this
cash, so he asked her, "Ma'am, I'm surprised you're carrying so much
cash around. Where did you get this money?"

The old lady replied, "I make bets."

The president then asked, "Bets? What kind of bets?"

The old woman said, "Well, for example, I'll bet you $25,000 that your
balls are square."

"Ha!" laughed the president, "That's a stupid bet. You can never win
that kind of bet!"

The old lady challenged, "So, would you like to take my bet?"

"Sure," said the president, "I'll bet $25,000 that my balls are not
square!"

The little old lady then said, "Okay, but since there is a lot of
money involved, may I bring my lawyer with me tomorrow at 10am as a
witness?"

"Sure!" replied the confident president.

That night, the president got very nervous about the bet and spent a
long time in front of a mirror checking his balls, turning from side
to side, again and again. He thoroughly checked them out until he was
sure that there was absolutely no way his balls were square and that
he would win the bet.

The next morning, at precisely 10am, the little old lady appeared with
her lawyer at the president's office. She introduced the lawyer to the
president and repeated the bet: "$25,000 says the president's balls
are square!"

The president agreed with the bet again and the old lady asked him to
drop his pants so they could all see. The president complied. The
little old lady peered closely at his balls and then asked if she
could feel them. "Well, okay," said the president, "$25,000 is a lot
of money, so I guess you should be absolutely sure."

Just then, he noticed that the lawyer was quietly banging his head
against the wall. The president asked the old lady, "What the hell's
the matter with your lawyer?"

She replied, "Nothing, except I bet him $100,000 that at 10am today
I'd have the Bank of Canada's president's balls in my hand."
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