The Place

The Paddock (Hungry Horace on Sussex road)
The Time 10:00 9th February 2001

The Menu

Breakfast for 2

The Cost

£2.50

This comprises of : 2 sausage, 2 bacon, 2 egg, 2 toast, black pudding, tomato's & beans !!! 

Extras         None required !!!

The Order: 10/10

Here we go ...........

Q : Can I swap my bacon for an extra sausage and drop the tomato's and black pudding ?

A : No problem !!!! Even offered more food in exchange for the tomato's and black pudding !!

Excellent..

The Review  5/10

So I manage to thaw my car and meet my friend at the cafe.  There are a couple of place's to park, a driveway or street.  I chose the street.  I entered, ordered and sat by the window.  The cafe itself is small, yet somehow manages to seat around 14 people.  Luckily for me I had my per-tractor with me and, after a few calculations, successfully deduced that it had been achieved by have really small tables. 

They even have a fruit machine, 10p a credit, that took £2 off me before I had even worked out what the hell all the flashing lights were trying to say.   

Each table had the salt, pepper, vinegar and red and brown sauce on and as I sat back down, what turned out to be, my first mug of tea arrived.  The mug was green and had strange little black marks on the inside.  It was a good cup of tea, also my first of the day and so naturally another was ordered to compliment the first.  This was another green mug and, like the first, also had strange little black marks on the inside (and I'm not talking tea leafs here!).

The toast was next out, 2 slice's, both cut in half and buttered.  Hmmmmmmmmm. I had a bite and the verdict :- looked ok, not to fantastic though.  A really good piece of toast is one you can eat on its own or with a breakfast.  These 2 slices were definatly only to be eaten with a breakfast.

As the breakfast then promptly arrived I saw what looked to be a promising meal.  The eggs where 2 perfect circles and both had runny yokes.  Nice.  The 3 sausages all looked good too, not to thin or too thick.  Plenty of beans.  The final ingredient ? Plenty of that red magic, Tomato sauce.

The first thing I notice is that my "safety" knife and fork are having a problem with the sausage, so instead of cutting through them they just rip the meat apart.  Still I can handle these sort of problems and tuck into my meal.  The eggs where fine but something wasn't.

Yes there has to be something and this was almost as dramatic as saying "We've no beans today!".  My beans where COLD.  not stone cold but not red hot either.  Before I'd had time to finish my breakfast the beans had lost the will to be hot. So I didn't finish my meal.

This is always a bad sign because you might have to explain leaving your meal to the cafe owners, almost feeling guilty even though you paid for it.  Sure enough she came and I successfully got away with leaving half of the food she'd delivered me.  My friend had to think on an excuse too along with another person, both had their excuse's too.

Overall a lot is given for your money and the actual taste is pretty good too.  The baked beans, like cheap tomato sauce, can just ruin a meal if their cold.  Provided you get hot beans and have a few fantastic excuse's ready, just in case you leave some, then you should be satisfied.

The tip : Good really hot beans, that says it all !!!!!!

Full Factor 5/10 Cold beans put me off, not fill me up.