Battle for Custody
The scene was a tiny mountain village in a remote section of West Virginia. An old mountaineer and his young wife were getting a divorce in the local court.
But custody of the children was a problem.
The mother jumped to her feet and protested to the judge that, since she had brought the children into this world, she should retain custody of them.
The old mountaineer also wanted custody of the children.
The judge asked for his side of the story and, after a long moment of silence, the mountaineer slowly rose from his chair and said, "Judge, when I put a quarter in a candy machine and a candy bar comes out, does it belong to me or the machine?"
A Blonde Police Stop
A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local police officer pulled her over and walked up to the car. The officer also happened to be a blonde and she asked for the blonde's driver's license.
The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and finally said to the blonde policewoman,
"What does a driver's license look like?"
Irritated, the blonde cop said,
"You dummy, it's got your picture on it!"
The blonde driver frantically searched her purse again and found a small, rectangular mirror down at the bottom. She held it up to her face and said,
"Aha! This must be my driver's license" and handed it to the blonde policewoman.
The blonde cop looked in the mirror, handed it back to the driver and said,
"You're free to go. And, if I had known you were a police officer too, we could have avoided all of this."
The Jokery:
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