Sorry, I Can't do That!
A police officer pulls over this guy who had been weaving in and out of the lanes.
He goes up to the guy's window and says,
"Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."
The man says,
"Sorry officer I can't do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that I'll have a really bad asthma attack."
"Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample."
"I can't do that either. I am a hemophiliac. If I do that, I'll bleed to death."
"Well, then we need a urine sample."
"I'm sorry officer I can't do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that I'll get really low blood sugar."
"Alright then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."
"I can't do that, officer."
"Why not?"
"Because I'm too drunk to do that."
The Helpful Wife
A male driver is pulled over by a cop and the following conversation takes place:
Man,
"What's the problem officer?"
Cop,
"You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone."
Man,
"No sir, I was going 65."
Wife,
"Oh Harry. You were going 80." (Man gives his wife a dirty look.)
Cop,
"I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light."
Man,
"Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light!"
Wife,
"Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks." (Man gives his wife a dirty look.)
Cop,
"I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt."
Man,
"Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car."
Wife,
"Oh Harry, you never wear your seat belt."
Man,
"Shut your mouth, woman!"
Cop,
"Ma'am, does your husband always talk to you this way?"
Wife,
"No, only when he's drunk."
The Jokery:
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